My essay is as follows:
What is social anxiety? (SocialPhobia) states “Social anxiety is the fear of social situations that involve interaction with other people. You could say social anxiety is the fear and anxiety of being negatively judged and evaluated by other people. It is a pervasive disorder and causes anxiety and fear in most all areas of a person’s life. It is chronic because it does not go away on its own.” Many people think of social anxiety as solely the fear of being judged/embarrassed when being the “center of attention” or “put in the spotlight,” but it’s so much more than that. Having social anxiety impairs adolescents and adults from being able to be themselves. It hinders their confidence level greatly and restricts their ability to feel welcomed into social situations. A social situation doesn’t just include school, work, and/or a crowded area, it also includes their house and home life. Having social anxiety can dramatically affect a person’s life, and more people than we think experience social anxiety everyday. Learning the triggers, pressures, fears and the road to healing anxiety disorders can not only benefit you, but everyone around you as well.
Having an anxiety disorder in general hinders your ability to interact in social situations, or in any setting. Having social anxiety crushes your confidence to the point where you no longer feel entitled as you should. Many people experiencing this and living with this tend to hibernate rather than explore. They find their safe haven and never feel the need to exit and rejoin social scenes. Now I’m not saying every person with an anxiety disorder is the same way, but in a general sense, this is what happens. An anxiety disorder, like (social phobia) said is a “pervasive disorder,” that causes a great deal of fear and loss of confidence in all settings and situations in a person’s life. “Social settings” aren’t just out in public, or at a restaurant, or in a store; a social setting can be every place in your daily life. Your home is a social setting, your room is a social setting, places that you don’t generally think about being social are social settings. We all have our “happy place,” but some people can’t seem to find theirs because they don’t feel happy nor safe to be themselves anywhere. “When I wasn’t in class, I hid in the forgotten corners of the library. Day after day, I’d sit at my partitioned desk and eat my celo wrapped brownie from the vending machine and read the same book on anxiety over and over until I knew every word by heart.” (What You Must Think Of Me Chapter 4 Page 41) People who have social anxiety are aware of what is it and that they have it, but it’s the matter of trying to overcome it that is the most difficult part. “ Young people who suffer from social phobia may have distorted views of what others think of them, which can lead them to avoid school, or other situations in which they believe other peers will judge or criticizes them.” (Anxiety Disorders Chapter 5- Page 47) Fears of embarrassment and judgment are totally normal to the average human being. What some don’t fully understand is that people who live with social anxiety have those fears, but they are amplified. Every time someone says something a little hurtful, of course it bothers you, but you eventually get over it and everyone eventually forgets; but for the person with anxiety, that moment and those words and that setting all stick inside their head on replay, which causes them more fear, which eventually cases them to avoid that setting entirely.
Someone dealing with an anxiety disorder, especially a social anxiety disorder tend to over evaluate situations. To be exact, they evaluate each individual situation in five stages. “Stage one: solely the anticipation of a social situation; for example, “Everyone will hear me stutter, people will focus on every word I say.” Stage two: Negative Thoughts and Beliefs About Self and Situation; (negative mental representation of the self), Expectation of Negative Evaluation. For example, “ I am incompetent in social situations, no one will like me if I stutter.” Stage three: Attentional Biases and Self Focus, split into two categories: External cues and internal cues. For example, “External cues include audience’s faces, and responses to stuttering. Internal cues include shaking, sweating, blushing, and increased heart rate.” Stage four: Strategies to reduce threat/anxiety. This includes “ Safety Behaviours (mental rehearsal, using safe words) Avoidance (eye contact, words, situations), and Escape.”Finally stage five: “Post-Event Processing ( I couldn’t get any of my words out, I made such a fool of myself.””) (“Maintenance of Social Anxiety in Stuttering: A Cognitive-Behavioral Model.”) The intense and meticulous thought process of someone with social anxiety is heartbreaking. No one should have to over analyze a situation to this extent all on the basis of the fear of being embarrassed and judged. Now I’m not saying there is an immediate solution, but there are ways others can help make situations a little less stressful for an individual. Part of that is learning the triggers and pressures people experience when dealing with anxiety. “There are a number of common triggers for Social Anxiety, and by far the most common one in my experience is speaking in front of an audience or giving a speech or presentation.” (Common Triggers of Social Anxiety.” Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness)
Not everyone triggers from the same things, triggers are unique to the individual dealing with social anxiety. For example, Sally might trigger when she is making small talk and get embarrased and uncomfortable, and Jason might trigger from people watching him while he is doing something. Helping someone is social situations whom has a hard time can dramatically change their definition of a social situation. If you see someone whom all of a sudden becomes uncomfortable, starts to sweat, blush, stutter, just do them a favor and back off a little on that topic of conversation or actions that made them this way, and switch topics, derail their anxiety and put the focus on something you know they are comfortable with.
Managing social anxiety might seem almost impossible, and avoiding social scenes seem like the best possible solution. But if people could learn how to invite and encourage others to join social scenes instead of push away and discourage others, things could change. In order to help people who are dealing with an anxiety disorder overcome it, people need to be understanding, welcoming, and helpful. Having social anxiety and being so secluded makes it even harder to rewire their thoughts of social scenes from horrifying and change it to accepting, warm, and inviting. “ Young adults with social anxiety/ phobia often become isolated and avoid interactions with other teens. This kind of self imposed isolation can make school a very lonely place.” (Anxiety Disorders- Chapter 5 page 50.) Middle school and high school can both be very stressful, but going through it alone can make it worse. Social anxiety is so prominent these days due to the increase of in school bullies, and cyber bullying. People no longer feel the safety and security of their homes because bullies are now everywhere. Now I’m not saying everyone with social anxiety has been or is being bullied, but it’s likely some people have experienced being bullied. Being bullied rapidly drops your self esteem, self confidence, and hinders your ability to truly be yourself. If people would realize what having an anxiety disorder feels like and walk a mile in their shoes, I’d hope bullying would decrease. That being said, we need to make school and other social setting even as broad as instagram a safe place. People need to feel comfortable going on social sites and to places and not even feel the need to stress over the thought of being judged or embarrassed or bullied. Some people need to stop being so narrow minded and judgemental in order to encourage everyone to join social settings and not dread going to school.
This project and topic was my way of explaining in depth the causes and effects of social anxiety and how people can really positively or negatively affect your life. People can be very mean, judgemental, and bullies, but do they really know the effects of their actions? Because I’m hopeful that if they, themselves were in the opposite pair of shoes, they would never act that way again. Learning the depth of social anxiety and how it starts, effects, and changes people’s lives can not only help you, but everyone around you. YOU can be the starting factor of a ripple effect. ONE single act of kindness can cause an explosion The other day I was reading a short blurb about a starbucks drive thru. One friendly customer offered to pay for the person behind them, whatever they got. Well what that person didn’t know was that their ONE act of kindness started a massive ripple effect. Following her, over 300 people then payed forward for the person behind them. Just ONE act of kindness and ONE social change affected hundreds. More people in this world who do simple, kind, generous acts, make this world a more loving, beautiful place. And if one person helps change the social normal of schools and make them a more accepting, loving, happy place, and take away all the judgement, embarrassment, and treat everyone equally, social anxiety individuals may become easier to cope with and learn how to get over.
Work Cited Page
“Common Triggers of Social Anxiety.” Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness,
overcomingsocialanxiety.com/common-social-anxiety-triggers/. Accessed 24 Apr. 2017.
Connolly, Sucheta, et al. Anxiety disorders. New York, Chelsea House, 2006.
Ford, Emily, et al. What you must think of me: a firsthand account of one teenager’s experience
with social anxiety disorder.
.Iverach, Lisa. “Maintenance of Social Anxiety in Stuttering: A Cognitive-Behavioral Model.”
American Journal of Speech-Language Pathology, 23 Mar. 2017,
“Social Anxiety Fact Sheet: What is Social Anxiety Disorder? Symptoms, Treatment,Prevalence, Medications, Insight, Prognosis.” Social Anxiety Fact Sheet | Social Anxiety Association,socialphobia.org/social-anxiety-disorder-definition-symptoms-treatment-therapy-medications-insight-prognosis. Accessed 25 May 2017.
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